The Dream 17/Aug/04
The Dream with Stuart Barnett and Robert Newbury.

Roy and HG name Thorpedo the "Lion of Athens" after winning another gold. Given the magnitude of the race with Phelps and Thorpedo HG reckons there should have been a bigger build up.

The Americans aren't going that well in the Olympics and people think its because they're supressing their normal ugliness and aren't 'boating' as much as they used to. At the Sydney Olympics they had a 'look at me', 'we're the best bro' swagger. The South African swimming team have started boating like the Americans used to. Roy loves it. Roy loves seeing sportsmen point in the air and making gestures telling everyone that they're the best.

Phillapous hasn't gone well in tennis and HG reckons he didn't have his tennis head on. So few people watched it that there isn't a single bit of footage of the match. It was just Roy, HG and Newk there.

Roy and HG commentate the fencing. The helmet mesh covering there faces are so dark that they can barely see eachother. The fencers have a 'you cant see me and I cant see you' thing going. One fencer was stabbed so many times that his body would have been a perforated mess if they used real swords.

Quite a few officials and people running the Olympics are Australian and Roy and HG says they're doing an impeccable job. Theres footage on a Danish volley ball player arguing with an aussie referee and aussie umpire keeps his cool despite the Danish player going on and on.

Former Olympians used to help new Olympians settle into the Olympic village but theyve been replaced by rugby players and V8 super car racers such as Brock. HG doesnt think they're up to it and want the the former Olympic legends back.

Stuart Barnett and Robert Newbury

Two Australian synchronized divers who won bronze at the Olympics. They were presented with medals from Princess Anne but they say there wasn't any sexual tension between them and her. They both train either together or individually and sometimes with mirrors. They're not mad about Steven Foley coaching England (formerly Australian coach) because they reckon he's not coaching only managing them.

Australia has teams representing every sport in the Olympic except European handball. The game includes a lot of throwing the ball at people, running around and also theres bit of brown at the goals. Its the sort of sport Australia should be going for and they want Australia to send a team to the next Olympics.

Someone emails and says that theres a lot of Greek artifacts turning up on eBay because all the kiddies are taking treasure while the security guards are at the olympics. They're chipping bits off the parthenon and the acropolis.