The Dream 22/Aug/04
The Dream with Jody Henry, Patria, Lisbeth, Alice Mills and Tamsin Lewis

A guy called Dick Pound has written a book about the Olympics. In the book people from 300BC travel to the future. Roy calls it pure Pound.

Bettina Hoy has been told to return one of her Gold medals after she went over the starting line. She's currently got the medals packed away in a suitcase and is on a plane back to Germany. The IOC will be waiting at the airport when she lands so they can take her medals off her. HG says the comments they made yesterday about Betina were cruel but fair. HG reckons they should have red lights like they have in drag racing and goes to green when the horse can go.

Thorpie has a company called Thorpedo Incorporated. Roy says Thorpies company is becoming like an octopus with so many products such as underpants and now softdrink and ouzo. The softdrink will be called the Lion of Athens sports water. Roy has swig and says it makes him want to go out and have a swim. He as a swig of the ouzo and says it wants to make him fight. Now he says he wants to swim and fight. A good thing that could happen with Thorpedos underpants is that people wearing will want to look good in them so they'll lose weight. It could solve the fat kid problem. Partner sees you in your undies and says 'Lets go babe' and you'll be trim and taut except in the part that matters.

An Olympics event has a moth problem with a cloud of moths making it difficult to see. It reminded Roy of the Sydney Olympics when Evonne Kenny had a moth go into his mouth while singing the national anthem at the closing ceromony. It was a great 'hands across the water' moment because it reminded Roy of Sydney.

Dawn Fraser doesn't like the Australians swimmers getting a big head. Roy remembers when Dawn was swimming in the Olympics her head was so big after she won her events that you couldnt recognise her. In 68 Roy won an Olympic event and his head got really big. The way he said he got rid of it was to get his mates to bring him back to earth. His mate Max Mensa got rid of Roys big head by saying "Roy, youve got a big head". Roy reckons after that he could feel his head puncture and deflate.

Roy and HG were against tennis in the Olympics but today some Australians won a medal in tennis. HG says its worth having tennis at the Olympics even if theres no specators if Australians get medals.

Shots of a bit of digging go on in the middle of base ball field. Even in the middle of the Olympics the Greeks can't resist going for a dig.

Roy and HG commentate the mens trampoline. One guy loses amplitude and does an old fashioned DG (dogs breakfast). He has 4 years to contemplate his stupidity.

On guy is known for being funny. His jokes are hilarious. Off the mat you couldn't find a funnier bloke.

This trampoliner is known as the 'Nordic Knob'. He previously did inline skating and was known as 'The Dick' but it was only when he moved to trampolining was he known as the 'Nordic Knob'.

Jody Henry, Patria, Lisbeth and Alice Mills

Australian relay swimmers who one the gold medal today. Now that they've won Roy wonders what sort of stuff they would like to get from sponsors. Two girls would like a car as long as its new. This is Patrias last Olympics and isnt tempted to try for Beijing.

Roy and HG commentate the weight lifting.

Tamsin Lewis

Australian 500 meter runner. She sometimes trains with the St Kilda football club team. Says that running with fit men in the team is good for motivation. Shes had problems with Athletics Australia who have called her fat and also disliked her posing in a Ralph magazine even though most other athletes are doing it. She spoke to them about there hypocracy but wasn't given an apology. HG gives her a whole lot of plates to smash. When leaving the show she gets the golden shovel (which all guests get when they leave the show) and she says she'll need it to dig herself out of the graves she's dug after dishing a lot of dirt on athletics Australia.

People are puzzled about Grant Hackets interview after winning gold. He thanks everyone who helped him win the gold including his sister who has been a great brother to him.

An emailer has the idea of selling Olympic glue made out of Olympic horses when they die. It could have a label on it saying from which horse the glue came from and the achievements that the horse made during its career.